Monday, November 8, 2010

Why I cannot stand Stephen Fry


Yes, I know it’s a minority view. Everybody else adores him. He’s intelligent! He speaks nicely! He’s gay but in a cuddly way, so all the mums like him! He’s … aargh. He’s so pleased to be him while all the time pretending not to be.

My aged dad enjoyed the Book of General Ignorance by UK comedy god John Lloyd and John Mitchison, so on Saturday I bought him the sequel, The Second Book of General Ignorance, which I am reading before passing it on. I recommend it to the max. This link is to Amazon but it would be cheaper – and just better – to buy it from your local bookseller. Retail in NZ is $25.

Both books are great, stuffed full of surprising facts.But this new one has a foreword by Stephen Fry called “Forethought”. He calls it this so he can talk about Prometheus and the gift of fire and how the Greek name “Prometheus” means in English “forethought” and OMG the whole thing is so arch and pretentious and self-regarding that I wanted to hurl the book across the room. But I couldn’t, because it is a present for my dad. 

Anyway, Fry begins with this quote:
Now, what I want is facts. Teach these boys and girls nothing but Facts. Facts alone are wanted in life. Plant nothing else, and root out everything elsc. You can only form the minds of reasoning animals upon Facts: nothing else will ever be of any service to them. This is the principle on which I bring up my own children, and this is the principle on which I bring up these children. Stick to Facts, sir!
He continues:
Nothing but a shudder runs up the spine of the sensible man, woman or child as they read these well-known words of Thomas Gradgrind in Dickens’s novel Hard Times.
‘But surely, Stephen,’ you say, in that way of yours, ‘QI and General Ignorance and all that they are or hope to be represent nothing more than the triumphant distillation of Gradgrindery, fact-dweebiness, trivia-hoarding and information-hugging. The world of noble ideas falls before your world of grinding facts. Facts are the abrasive touchstones on which we test the validity of concepts! Surely, Stephen. Surely, surely, surely! I’m right, aren’t I? Aren’t I? Oh do say I am!’
Well now, bless you and shush and oh you dear things. Calm yourselves and sit down in a semicircle on the play mat while we think about this.
No, I cannot calm myself and sit on the play mat while I think about this. Instead, I say, “Fuck off.”

UPDATE: Stephanie says in the comments:
I once stayed in the same hotel as he in Bali: we shared the same pool areas and dining rooms over a few days, and there was something about him I couldn't quite put my finger on, as the saying goes. [. . .] Now I know what it was, that aura of smugness hovering around him despite the humidity.
I have added a photo of him with his mother. (Yes, I spoil you, because you deserve it.) My mother has never gazed up at me quite so adoringly, but then I am not Stephen Fry.

5 comments:

Stephanie said...

"He’s so pleased to be him while all the time pretending not to be."

I one stayed in the same hotel as he in Bali: we shared the same pool areas and dining rooms over a few days, and there was something about him I couldn't quite put my finger on, as the saying goes. Until this am.

Thank you.

Now I know what it was, that aura of smugness hovering around him despite the humidity.

Anonymous said...

Here I was thinking I was like the child, pointing at the naked Emperor saying, 'but surely all that self-effacing mummery is just a front for a giant self-satisfied ego, isn't it?' and everyone else saying, 'hush! can't you see he's a tortured ever-so humble genius.' Nice to know I'm not alone. I'm going to do wees all over his play mat.
-Michelle

Stephen Stratford said...

Thank you, Stephanie and Michelle. It's nice to know I am not alone.

IT IS ALLY said...

"He’s so pleased to be him while all the time pretending not to be."

Oh my God, I could not agree more.
I'm not saying that I wouldn't be exactly the same if I was him, but it still annoys the crap out of me. It's like everything he does is a big in-joke, and nobody is smart enough to get it except him, but that's ok! He'll just sit there and smirk at us. YUCK.

Stephen Stratford said...

Indeed, Ally, we would probably be as smug and smirking as him if we were him and so pleased to be him. But we are not.