Cambridge Edition letter of the month

Today’s issue of our local weekly, the Cambridge Edition, has this heartfelt plea (not online):

To the person who stole our beloved pet sheep from our property on [insert address two streets away from mine] on Saturday night or early Sunday morning, can we please have him back.

Monty was like a member of our family. He used to come inside and watch TV with us and we miss him so much. If anybody knows anything about Monty’s disappearance, please could they contact us. We will give a reward for information leading to Monty’s return.

Yes, we would all like to have our pet sheep inside with us while we watch TV. As a family.

I wonder what his favourite programme was. Country Calendar, perhaps. Probably nothing from the Food Channel. Any suggestions?

PS the picture above is from this deeply weird story in – you guessed! – the Daily Mail.