Thursday, December 9, 2010

You swearing at me?

From Stuff, my source of choice for important breaking news:
The latest contestant to be booted out of Survivor: Nicaragua, Alina Wilson, vents about the villain of the show Naonka and being called a ‘dirt squirrel’.
A dirt squirrel, huh? I have been called worse things. Nepi Solomon, author of at least one huge international bestseller (under another name) and the 1994 novel Jubilee (later a movie), tried to bust up me and a girlfriend by telling her father that I was a “serial datist”. I still don’t know what that means, though at this distance from the single life it sounds kind of fun. 

Anyway, more insults beckon. BoingBoing has this but Reddit is the Ur-source. You choose. Many are far too filthy to be repeated in a family blog such as this, but here are some samples:
I really like this Greek/cypriot phrase which basically means you’re really overcomplicating something:
Εκαμεs τον μουτσιον επιστήμη
Translated:
You made masturbation a science
[A comment] In French we say “You’re sodomizing flies”.
[Another comment]: The Dutch phrase for giving too much attention to insignificant details is “ant fucking”. I guess the French have us beat on that one.
Most of the Finnish ones are too filthy but:
Also, something can be “juosten kustu”. It means that something is done half-assed, but it translates roughly like something is like someone tried to pee while running.
And this:
Also, “pilkunnussija”, meaning “a comma fucker”. Used about someone who corrects little or meaningless things.
Finally:
Da bog ti kuca bila na CNN.
It’s Serbian for “may your house be live on CNN”. It may seem like a compliment, but consider what usually gets Serbian houses on American/International television. :(
There is lots, lots more. The Hindi stuff is great. I had Indian friends at university and OMG their insults were astoundingly rude. Nick Cave would blush.

Here is the great John Prine with a song from his 1988 album German Afternoons, “Let’s Talk Dirty in Hawaiian”.

6 comments:

Unknown said...

Love the 'you made masturbation a science' line but I hadn't realised the Greeks and Cypriots were having to deal with post-modernism so early on.

Stephen Stratford said...

Early adopters of pre-post-modernism. Possibly that is short for preposterous modernism.

Curious yellow said...

'author of at least one huge international bestseller (under another name)'

You are such a tease. Come on, name please.

Stephen Stratford said...

Yvonne. And no, it wasn't Yvonne du Fresne.

Anonymous said...

Yvonne Kalman?

Chad Taylor said...

Is this a family blog? Fuck.